Do you ever feel like your whole world is falling apart? Do you ever feel like your reality is being turned inside out? Do you ever feel like there is no escape to your problems?
There are definitely times in life when it can seem like the sky is falling on top of our heads. These are the moments that are the hardest to endure in life, but at the same time, they are also the occasions when Allah Most High shares extraordinary secrets with us.
The beauty of going through a test is that within those trying hours Allah Most High will gift us with presents that we probably would not appreciate outside of these situations. Undoubtedly, it is only through the ups and downs that we find and grow to appreciate the jewels of patience, contentedness, reliance on Allah, and absence from attachment to anything other than Allah.
However, it may be very difficult to see that there is light at the end of the tunnel. So, if you feel like your sky is falling right now, try these top survival tips:
Depending on the intensity of the situation, it’s possible to feel like you’re suffocating and there’s no escape. Honestly speaking, this can sometimes be more of a perception that we create than reality itself.
Take some time out of your day to sit in silence and just breathe. Keep in mind that most tests in life only last for a limited amount of time. There will be an end to it inshaAllah; it’s just that we don’t know when.
Remember that Allah Most High is the best of planners and there is goodness in whatever He wills for the believers. He loves you and will come to your aid if you put your full trust in Him. Return to Him and rely on His help. Spend time pondering over this idea and become realized in it inshaAllah.
Another solution is to take actual time off. Divert your mental focus away from the situation. Do something completely unrelated to the problem and give your mind a break from thinking about it. When you return, you may notice that you’re not as engrossed in the problem and perhaps gained new insights.
Catastrophizing is when we blow the situation out of proportion and land ourselves in the quicksand of hopelessness.
For example, we get into an argument with a loved one. We may tell ourselves, “I accept that this happened, but it hurts so much. I wish we didn’t have to fight. I want things to change.” This is a healthy mindset. It’s honest, balanced, and paves the way to possibly finding a long-term solution.
However, there are some who will take it a step further and say, “If we don’t overcome this, our relationship is over and I’ve lost everything because I won’t be able to live without this person in my life.” This type of thinking can encourage a harmful emotional attachment to the situation by eventually poisoning our minds with anger, resentment, and spite towards the other person.
- Is that thought really 100% true?
- Have I lost more than I gained or gained more than I lost?
- What lessons have I learned through all of this? How can I benefit from this test?
- What are the potential solutions? How can I actively help to make things better for myself or easier for others?
- Will it really matter five years from now? Ten years from now? Twenty years from now? When I’m in my grave?
Allah has created in all of us the ability and power to solve our own problems. These questions help us to keep perspective and become proactive – as opposed to catastrophizing, which distorts our thought process and causes us to experience more pain because we feel helpless.
Lean on a friend.
Humans are social creatures. We need company and during the hard times, a good buddy is more than necessary.
Find someone who you trust that can guide you through the situation. Don’t try to manage it on your own. Sometimes another person’s presence can spiritually uplift you or their kind words will direct you towards seeing the goodness in your test.
It is reported that the Prophet ﷺ said, “Verily, the believers are like a structure, each part strengthening the other.” (Bukhari, Muslim)
Find strength in the iman of others and grow stronger in your faith along the way inshaAllah.
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© Muslima Coaching, 2019.