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The Best Of Women

Known for being the first beloved wife of the Prophet ﷺ, our mother Sayyidatuna Khadija (Allah be pleased with her) was a shining example of an extraordinary Muslim wife. When describing her, the Prophet ﷺ said that she is the best of women. (Tirmidhi)

Sayyidatuna Khadija (Allah be pleased with her)  was a noble woman born from fine lineage. She had been married twice before, owned her own successful business, and was wealthier and older than her husband at the time of their marriage. From an outward perspective, she seemingly possessed many worldly advantages compared to her young spouse, who was only 25 years of age. In fact, when she married the Prophet ﷺ he had not yet received the revelation that announced his destined prophecy.

However, despite all of this, she did not treat her husband at a lower degree. Rather, she thought so highly of him that it is related that she gifted Halima (Allah be pleased with her), the Prophet’s wet nurse, with 40 sheep on the day of their wedding out of pure honor for breastfeeding her husband.

Their household was continually filled with joy and happiness, and Sayyidatuna Khadija (Allah be pleased with her)  gave birth to six of the Prophet’s ﷺ children. When the Prophet ﷺ chose to leave their household by himself for a period of time in order to worship Allah in the cave of Hira, Sayyidatuna Khadija respected his need. Not only did she sacrifice her time with him, but she was supportive of his decision and brought him food on several occasions.

When the Prophet ﷺ eventually fled to her and related that an angel came to him claiming that he was truly a Prophet ﷺ, she affirmed this heavenly message and replied to him, “Indeed, I hope that you will be the Prophet of this nation.” She believed in him. She was there for him. She was his number one fan. And when he ﷺ was shaking and asked her to cover him, she consoled him and complimented his manhood, saying that he was the most trustful, the one who was generous with his guests, and the one who was chivalrous by helping those in trouble. Her words and actions earned her the rank of being the first believer in Islam. But she was not only that, she was also the first believer in her husband ﷺ.

When the Quraysh set the economic ban on the believers, which prohibited all trade and interaction with the Muslims of Makkah, Sayyidatuna Khadija (Allah be pleased with her) lost her wealth and her health. But what is so remarkable is that she did not complain to her husband or declare that he was making bad choices. She persevered and remained by his side, firm in her decision to be his source of comfort during the massive trials that he was facing. They underwent the tests together as a team, motivated by each other’s love and their longing to please Allah Most High.

When the ban was lifted, due to the severe harm that it inflicted upon her physical well-being, she subsequently passed onto her Creator (Allah be pleased with her). But we must remember who she died as. She left this world earning the reward of being a fantastically supportive, loving, and encouraging wife. She did not criticize her husband or express her doubt in him. She did not fight him until ‘death do us part.’ She was his best friend, his number one fan, and the woman that he could forever depend upon when no one else believed in him. She understood him. She respected him. She honored him. And Allah Most High honored her, promising her a lofty station in Paradise.

It is related that whenever the Prophet ﷺ mentioned Sayyidatuna Khadija (Allah be pleased with her), he would praise her with the best of praises. One day, one of the Prophet’s wives became jealous. The Prophet ﷺ explained to her: Allah has not given me better than her. She had faith in me when my people rejected in me. She believed in me when my people denied me. She shared her wealth with me when my people withheld from me, and Allah only granted me children through her. (Ahmad)

Thus, the message that Allah Most High sent us as Muslim women is clear:

Be your husband’s Khadija.

The spirit and gift that she brought to her marriage can be relived in your own too inshaAllah.

© Muslima Coaching, 2016.

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Naielah Ackbarali

Ustadha Naielah Ackbarali is the founder and CEO of Muslima Coaching. She is passionate about inspiring Muslim women by way of spreading the beauty of living an Islamic life. Ustadha Naielah is a trained strategic relationship coach, certified life coach, and a certified NLP Master Practitioner. Combined with her knowledge of the shariah sciences, coaching experience, and personal marriage of 15 years, she also offers faith-based marriage coaching and relationship advice.